Lessons on Being Forgetful

Lately, I feel like I'm always asking the Lord to "keep me from being a knucklehead". It's simple not-as-complicated when I am by myself. But add other people to the mix and I'm basically helpless. I say the worst things, and I desperately lack a servant's heart that I find myself admiring in others. Take Black Friday, for example(technically it was Thursday evening...so does that make it Black Thursday? Purple Thursday? It's an advertising kerfuffle at this point...): Tyler and I went out to Target. This was at  7:00, so naturally there was a long line of people wrapped around the store. All we wanted to do was observe the line, so we ventured to the back. But as soon as we got back there,someone rudely blurted out, "You'd better start walking...". He had this pompous tone in his voice that seemed to say, I arrived earlier than you did, so I will get my pretty play things, and you lose.  It was some teenager who thought he was funny...or cute...or something.Maybe his girlfriend was standing beside him and he wanted to sound witty. He wasn't. (Word to the wise: being a smart-alike is not considered wordplay. You'll never win her heart that way, boys). And I was infuriated. It took everything I had not to retaliate. My brain exploded with comebacks.  My husband laughed at me as I spouted out a lengthy response while we walked. Oh yes,I told that boy and it felt great. I pouted a bit as I took my seat up front.  If only I had thought of that in the moment. I might as well have. Everyone else at the Target probably heard me whining.

I shuddered. Yikes. 

The next morning I read Philippians 2. Now, I usually don't study using The Message, but I have lately, just for kicks. This is what it said:

 ^1-4 If you’ve gotten anything at all out of following Christ, if his love has made any difference in your life, if being in a community of the Spirit means anything to you, if you have a heart, if you care— then do me a favor: Agree with each other, love each other, be deep-spirited friends. Don’t push your way to the front; don’t sweet-talk your way to the top. Put yourself aside, and help others get ahead. Don’t be obsessed with getting your own advantage. Forget yourselves long enough to lend a helping hand. ^5-8 Think of yourselves the way Christ Jesus thought of himself. He had equal status with God but didn’t think so much of himself that he had to cling to the advantages of that status no matter what. Not at all. When the time came, he set aside the privileges of deity and took on the status of a slave, became human! Having become human, he stayed human. It was an incredibly humbling process. He didn’t claim special privileges. Instead, he lived a selfless, obedient life and then died a selfless, obedient death—and the worst kind of death at that—a crucifixion.


If you have a heart, if you care, if his love has made any difference in your life...forget yourselves long enough to lend a helping hand.

Oh, right. That's what this season is about. So I'm not supposed to prove my point when I feel like someone is wrong? So I'm not supposed to insist on my own way?

...

Sometimes I feel like I just can't get it right(see video at bottom) Sometimes I truly feel like a failure. Because I do fail...everyday. But the beauty in all of my messiness, is not what I do  or don't do. It's what the Holy Spirit does within me. And I need him daily to become more like Jesus. People are supposed to see Jesus when they look at me, not hear my snarky comeback. His love--his salvation--is my catalyst. Because of the way he loves me and the life he has given me, I can move forward into love. I CAN make people feel value. No, I don't have it together, but here's a secret that some miss: you don't have to(yes, I know I ended a sentence with a preposition...at least I admit it, and I am not blindly living in an oblivion of grammatical errors)And what's more: Jesus wants failures. He prefers to use people who admittedly fail everyday, to show the world how much he can do. He came to earth, as a mere infant, to "forget himself long enough" to die; to make the ultimate sacrifice, to show the perfect kind of love.

Forget yourself, Susanna. Just forget yourself.

And love people.